Margin Notes

The holidays bring a lot of joy and also a lot of pressure, and students experience this just as adults do. A recent New York Times article suggests a simple and refreshing idea. Along with the long lists of things we need to get done, we can also make a list of things we give ourselves permission not to do. Writer Jancee Dunn describes her family’s holiday routines and the pressure to keep everything perfect. After speaking with psychologists and authors, she begins to create her own “to don’t” list. The experts in the article encourage readers to make some small shifts to make the holiday season feel lighter and more manageable.

Read or Listen:

Teachers can invite students to read the short article and then use the invitations below to rehearse their thinking before a discussion on the article

There is also an option to listen to a discussion of the article on The Mental Breakdown and Psychreg Podcast. Hosts Dr Berney and Dr Marshall talk about the idea of “to don’t” lists in their episode and begin discussing the article around the twelve minute and thirty second mark.

Quickwrite Invitations:

After reading the article, or listening to the discussion, students can select one of the invitations below and teachers can provide time after writing for optional sharing.

• Create your own “to don’t” list. What are a few things you give yourself permission not to take on during the holiday season?
• Write about one expectation you feel you must meet. What would it feel like to release it?
• Think about a tradition or routine that no longer fits. What might you change or simplify so that it is a better fit?
• Imagine what you would have more time or energy for if you removed one item from your list and write about that.

This can lead to a thoughtful conversation about the expectations students carry and the ones they might choose to let go of.